Prayer

"I hate vain thoughts: but thy law do I love" (Psalm 119:113).
O Lord how I long to see you in your word! My fleshly body is too weak to search out your word as I should and my mind, in and of itself, is sorely limited and diseased with sin. Thoughts that ought to be turned to behold your mercy, goodness, and glory seem to be intercepted and turned into all manner of distractions. I am puzzled at this and wonder if the reason and source leading to this torturous state is external in nature, due to the intense spiritual warfare that is waged behind the scenes of our soul, and is common among those that profess your name, or if it is solely the result of my own carnal self. Perhaps it is both. Regardless of the truth of this, I need your grace and help. Deliver me from the distractions that accompany such a fallen mind as mine. Strengthen my body. Give me opportunity, motivation, and ambition to study and apply your word. Prevent any external spiritual attacks on my soul that would separate me from you, preventing me by way of distraction or temptation from a closer walk with you. Give sight to my minds eye. Renew my mind so that I may behold you more closely. Even if I had a mind that is more able and intellectually capable it would be limited respecting spiritual things. But this is not the case. There is not anything in me that enables me to sufficiently know truth that is divine. All such knowledge of and intimacy with you must come from you alone. I am too weak to remove these hindrances and barriers. But you are sovereign and able to do all that I ask and much more. Take pity on me respecting this request to know you and answer my prayer.