Psalm 119:18 Luke 24:45

"Open thou mine eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of thy law" (Ps. 119:18).
"Then opened he their understanding, that they might understand the scriptures..." (Lk.24:45)

Prayer

"I hate vain thoughts: but thy law do I love" (Psalm 119:113).
O Lord how I long to see you in your word! My fleshly body is too weak to search out your word as I should and my mind, in and of itself, is sorely limited and diseased with sin. Thoughts that ought to be turned to behold your mercy, goodness, and glory seem to be intercepted and turned into all manner of distractions. I am puzzled at this and wonder if the reason and source leading to this torturous state is external in nature, due to the intense spiritual warfare that is waged behind the scenes of our soul, and is common among those that profess your name, or if it is solely the result of my own carnal self. Perhaps it is both. Regardless of the truth of this, I need your grace and help. Deliver me from the distractions that accompany such a fallen mind as mine. Strengthen my body. Give me opportunity, motivation, and ambition to study and apply your word. Prevent any external spiritual attacks on my soul that would separate me from you, preventing me by way of distraction or temptation from a closer walk with you. Give sight to my minds eye. Renew my mind so that I may behold you more closely. Even if I had a mind that is more able and intellectually capable it would be limited respecting spiritual things. But this is not the case. There is not anything in me that enables me to sufficiently know truth that is divine. All such knowledge of and intimacy with you must come from you alone. I am too weak to remove these hindrances and barriers. But you are sovereign and able to do all that I ask and much more. Take pity on me respecting this request to know you and answer my prayer.

On Judging others and Ourselves

If we are content with the present state of our moral condition, believing ourselves to have already obtained to an accceptable degree of righteousness, and see no further need for mortification of sin, or no need to strive after righteousness at all, we have too high of a view of ourselves. Even if sudden or constant awareness of our own ever present sin stuns us, we have too high a view of ourselves. If we are overly conscious of, and shocked by, sin in the lives of others (whether they are believers or not) to the point of unlawfully judging them, and finding ourselves to the contrary of and not taking pity on them, earnestly and lovingly desiring their restoration, we have too high of a view of ourselves. We ought to be shocked by sin, but not surprised as to the extent and effects of depravity that still remains in the fleshly bodies of those of us who are the children of Abraham, and indeed which is present in all of the sons of Adam.

Timothy Rogers Quote

"It is a strange thing that any good people should be so passionate and hasty as some are. They are quickly enraged, and hard to be reconciled; and there are many who will keep their anger for several months and, it may be, years at a time. Oh, how this is unlike that God whom they call their Father in heaven, who is slow to wrath, and whose anger towards them is but for a moment! And what an honor and a privilege would it be to resemble Him! If He were not more patient with His creatures and His children than they are with one another, what confusions, what woeful punishments would the world be filled with! 'Anger resteth in the bosom of fools' (Ecclesiastes 7:9). ...Hasty, passionate people are commonly the weaker sort of Christians. ...What differences have been kept up in churches, in families, among acquaintances and friends, for a long period of time, whose anger should have been like that of God, but for a moment! We are unwilling to pardon our enemies, or the injuries of our friends; and God is most ready to forgive us all. ...Seeing that the anger of God is but for a moment, then it is better, as for the temporal effects of it, to fall into the hands of God than into the hands of men. (Trouble of Mind and the Disease of Melancholy Rogers 42-45).

Disquietness of Soul and the Remedy to it

There are some of us that suffer with spiritual melancholy and though we know of the cure (Christ) our spirits, nevertheless, are oftentimes despondent, anxious, downcast, tormented, weighted down with the cares of this world, burdened with doubts, assaulted by the devil, and wrongly suffer under a sense of the guilt of sin and dreadful fear of eternal damnation. Like the psalmist so often expressed it is as if God has forsaken us, that he does not hear and answer our prayers, that our bones are broken, that our strength has failed us, and that we are brought to the very brink of death. There are seasons when minutes seem to pass like hours, which in turn seem to pass like days, and days pass like months. Then there are periods of time when our days seem to vanish as quickly as a vapor. There seems to be nowhere for the soul to find comfort and release from such a relentless and horrible condition. No amount of doctrinal understanding, reading, praying, church ordinances, or counseling from ministers and friends will quite our spirits. We seem to be in utter despair and without all hope. being careful that we do not miss the mark of salvation we go too far, becoming sinfully obsessive with the matter. Our minds simply will not give us rest. All is night and there is no sun to shine on our faces. Winter is constant and there are no summer days. There are Storms but no calm.
If this is your case, as it is so often mine, consider this for a possible remedy: There are only four ways to live our earthly lives in lieu of our definite and indubitable eternal destiny that awaits us. (1) We can live with a constant vexation of spirit, which I believe to be more self-inflicted than any thing else, only to find out that we were never saved, and will in the end, after suffering a seemingly hell on this earth suffer a real hell after we die. (2) We can psychologically convince ourselves to go through life with the attitude of eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we die; to live without a care in the world, but again only to find out that in the end we are lost. With this approach to life we face sure damnation if we are wrong about what may await us. This does seem to be better though in a sorted sense than suffering twice. (3)We may live with a constant downcast spirit only to find out that in the end we did have saving grace. In essence this is hell on earth and bliss in heaven. Such a state is contrary and inconsistent to the promises, blessings, and the peace (even in the storms of life) that come from knowing God. (4) We can live by faith in Christ for our righteousness and throw sinful concerns and caution to the wind of the Spirit of God, living a life that is free of the heavy burdens that weight us down. It is then that we will enter into heaven having lived as if we are already in its suburbs now. And as if there was no heaven or hell at all, what has one lost? I know that this is not the case though. Let us ask ourselves, "do we really have faith?" Do we really believe that we have Christ for our righteousness no matter our past, present, or future sins? Doubt is a reality but assurance may be obtained. Let us not rest until we have it!
"His favor towards you, will make you blessed; but nothing but the sense of it will cause you to rejoice" Trouble of Mind and the Disease of Melancholy Timothy Rogers P.238).
"Rejoice evermore." (I Thess. 5:16)

Timothy Rogers Quote

"The enemy of our souls is full of rage, but that which fills him with fury may yield us comfort, because we know that his time is short. 'The God of peace shall bruise Satan under your feet shortly' (Romans 16:20) (Rogers Trouble of Mind and the Disease of Melancholy Pg.31,32).

Psalms 94:18

"When I said, My foot slipeth; thy mercy, O Lord, held me up (Ps. 94:18).

Timothy Rogers Quote

"Nor are the degrees of your sorrows here proportional to the degrees of your approaching glory" (Rogers Trouble of Mind and the Disease of Melancholy Pg. 30).