Friday, May 22, 2009

The Fearful Fugitive and his Flight to God from Sin

When I said, My foot slippeth; thy mercy, O LORD, held me up.
-Psalm 94:18


Lord, I know that there is a difference between fearing God out of love of sin and fearing sin out of love of God, as well as loving God out of fear of sin. And so Lord, help me to love you as much as I hate sin and to hate sin in proportion to my love for you. God grant me the strength to be more diligent in work and devotion to you as I have been so diligent to pursue sin. If sin has lent a hand in the advancement of Satan's kingdom how much more ought my love of you keep me about my Father's business? O that I was as diligent in my Father's kingdom as I have been in the matter of worldly things. If an almost relentless procession of sinful thoughts can so occupy and assault my mind, cannot a truly affectionate heart rooted in and devoted to you, eternal God, infinitely occupy my thoughts and that to the the renewing of my mind? Thoughts of one will by necessity prevail over the other. So teach me to love you with all my heart mind and soul. Give me grace that I will never let my watchful guard down and allow my conscience to be sorely wounded by sin again. Lord, sometimes I feel as if I am a fearful fugitive fleeing from sin and its consequence. It is as if Pharaoh and all of the Egyptian army are fast on my heels. But Lord, I find comfort in this thought: if I am a fugitive it is not from your authority but from that of Satan's rule and dominion. You have not rewarded me evil for evil, but good for evil. Though it is a true principle that we reap what we sow, I have not always reaped the reward of iniquity, but the produce of grace. In this your mercy has been great towards me. It is but mere superstition that we get what we deserve. This sort of karma is what pagans believe not understanding your gracious nature. Keep me from falling, Lord. When my foot begins to slip it is your mercy o Lord that holds me up. Let me have a foothold that is sure that I might diligently flee from sin into your loving arms.

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